Advice

Difficult feelings

People often find aspects of being a carer positive and rewarding. However, it can also bring up feelings that are difficult to accept or address, such as frustration, anger and resentment.

You might feel frustrated at the impact that being a carer has on your life. Sometimes, you might be angry with yourself for not living up to your own expectations, or other people’s. You might resent your situation or the person with dementia – either way, you can end up feeling guilty about this.

All these emotions can be difficult to admit to, let alone to find ways of dealing with them. Yet bottling them up or trying to ignore them can make things worse for both you and the person you care for. The first step is to start talking.

Not alone

Many people find it helpful to share difficult feelings with each other on our online community, Talking Point. Whatever is happening, someone else has probably gone through something similar. You are not alone.

Carers on Talking Point often talk about having to face the ‘guilt monster’ when dealing with these feelings. Sharing how you’re feeling – with people who understand – can make this less overpowering and more manageable.

Safe space

We have a forum called ‘Dealing with difficult feelings’, which only Talking Point members can read. This is a safe, understanding and supportive space where you can be anonymous if you like.

In this area, many people find it easier to say how they feel, hear how others are coping and see what else might help.

By sharing what they're going through on Talking Point, people can feel less alone and more able to tackle the challenges involved in being a carer.

Next steps

• Join our online community Talking Point.